This answer made both the Kunlun Jun from that side of the memory and the Zhao Yunlan onthis end fall silent.
Suddenly, it was no longer important whether that ball of fire was purposefully thrown down byShennong.
Shennong clutched Kunlun’s wrist. He stared at the ignorant and ferocious ghost tribe with hismurky old eyes and took two steps forward. He was already elderly and Kunlun had no choicebut to bend down slightly to carefully support him. When he looked down at Shennong, Kunlun’sexpression contained an imperceptible shadow – he’s old, this meant that he would die soon.
Kunlun Jun had never experienced “old age” or “death” before, but he had already smelled thatterrible decay from Shennong’s body.
“The things I said to Nuwa last time, you heard it all?” Shennong asked.
Kunlun Jun furrowed his eyebrows: “Who’s in the mood to listen to you guys’ endlessmysterious ramblings? Just talk about what we should do now. You even mentioned Nuwa tome. If she knew that you old folk trembled and burned through the Fuxi seal, I’d be surprised ifshe didn’t turn against you…And you even used my soul fire. You really know how to bringdisaster my way.”
Shennong glanced at him: “She won’t.”
Kunlun Jun hmm-ed twice sarcastically: “I beg to differ.”
Shennong coughed for a while in an old and feeble way: “Life and death are very important. Ifyou live without fear you are akin to dead. You can’t take them as jokes. However, if you canjump out of the circle of life and death, you will no longer need to fear.”
“I am going to stand here obediently. I’m not going to jump anywhere and I have no need to beafraid.” Kunlun Jun replied coolly, “Seems like the one who should be afraid is you—Oh right,Da Shenmu’s fruits are ripe. These 100 years, there have only ever been two ripe ones. I gaveone to my cat bro, the other one I saved for you. It can extend your life 100 years.”
“Thank you very much.” Shennong smiled, “Actually I’m not afraid of death either. Little Kunlun,you don’t understand. No death, no extinction, no godhood. Maybe when we all die, you willunderstand.”
Kunlun Jun rolled his eyes and looked around. It seemed as though he really wanted to findsomething to stuff into Shennong’s bizarre mouth.
“There will be hope.” At last, as they were leaving, Shennong looked at the land filled with theghost tribe and said, “If there can even be life in the most desolate places, is there anything thatis impossible?”
Kunlun Jun assisted him through the uneven terrain. When he heard this sentence, he turnedhis head around to look at the two members of the ghost tribe who were closest to them. One ofthem had the other’s head in its grasp and was gnawing on it. The great sage of the barrenmountains furrowed his eyebrows and said pointedly: “Enough, old fart, does this shitty life evencount? Seems to me like you’re becoming confused with your old age. If you have the time, youbetter first think about how you’re going to tell Nuwa about this.”
As Kunlun Jun and Shennong left the profane land, the silently observing Shen Wei grabbedZhao Yunlan’s hand: “Let’s go.”
They also followed along. Only then did Shen Wei say: “With your intelligence, it’s notnecessarily that you didn’t figure out what Shennong was thinking. It’s only that you thought hisideas were too fanciful and so you didn’t go along with them.”
Zhao Yunlan paused, then said: “So… Shennong wanted to form the wheel of reincarnation. Aslong as souls aren’t extinguished, they can reincarnate in the Six Realms, so life turns to deathand death turns to life—this is what he meant by his words ‘stand outside of life and death,’ isn’tit?”
Shen Wei laughed lightly: “Shennong wanted to use the underworld, and at the verge of true‘death’ separate yin and yang to set up the wheel of reincarnation.”
“But later he didn’t succeed, or else Nuwa wouldn’t sacrifice herself to die for the Great Seal,”Zhao Yunlan said.
“Do you know why?” Shen Wei stopped, a strange smile showing on his face. Without waitingfor Zhao Yunlan to reply, he answered himself. “Because the ghost tribe doesn’t have souls.”
The most murderous, soulless ones…
“We’re merely chaos, sinister currents—no matter how high or low the rank, from birth to deathwe only have the instinct to swallow, to plunder, to crave the freshest flesh.” For the first time,Shen Wei discovered that when he said these words, unexpected delight was in his heart—likethe kind of delight from willfully pressing down on his body’s wounds, or from using a knife toslice his own flesh, cut by cut. “As for me—because you raised me up to godhood, I became afreak who’s neither human nor god, neither demon nor ghost, but a chimera matchless in thisworld.”
Zhao Yunlan was speechless.
Shen Wei laughed lightly again. From the beginning, when Zhao Yunlan indicated he knewShen Wei was deceiving him, Shen Wei’s heart had settled down like a lump of ice, neatlystoppered there in suspended motion and chilling his whole body—unbearably pent up until hefinished saying these words. To his surprise, he felt almost miraculously carefree.
“There’s really no one who can clearly say what the ghost race is, when all’s said and done;perhaps we’re just a mutation of chaos, merely chaos that can run and move and nothing more.What Gui Mian (t/n Yezun in drama) said is also right, in fact: ‘death’ itself flared up and boiledover from a flame and spawned us, we ‘living things’ who aren’t truly born and can’t truly die.Actually, we’re quite a freak accident.” Shen Wei’s smile weakened. He turned his face to look atZhao Yunlan, his voice intimate and gentle: “But you insisted on acting recklessly by provokingme. Don’t you know what kind of thing you’re provoking? Don’t you know it’s dangerous?”
Zhao Yunlan embraced him from behind: “Hey, tell me the main points. I don’t want to hear thisshit.”
The warmth of that body flowed out from his hug—like the kind felt by a person with their chestfrozen numb, who had swallowed their first mouthful of hot congee and almost shivered at thewarmth.
Shen Wei remained silent for a while, then clasped the hands in front of his chest with his ownand continued: “Mount Buzhou collapsed, the heaven and the earth crumbled and unexpectedlyinterrupted the battle between humans, demons, and witches. Continuous rain fell from thesky—that rain washed away the resentment in the air and caused it to land on the ground,creating barren lands. Underground were hundreds of millions of the ghost tribe climbing upfrom the abyss…you should have seen all this when you were in the Da Shenmu. The first timeI saw you should actually be at the place where I was born. However, you were standing too faraway and refused to get closer to me by even a step as if I was something filthy. My eyesweren’t fully opened and I was only able to vaguely make out the shadows of green clothes.”
Shen Wei closed his eyes. He nuzzled his chin gently against Zhao Yunlan’s hands and he saidin a slightly lowered voice: “But from the moment when I was born I was more ferocious than mybrother, devouring more of my race. At that time I already had the ability to hear and couldroughly understand what you and Shennong were talking about. That’s why I am different fromhim. From the time I was born, I knew what I was. I searched for you all over the world, enduringthe temptations of the flesh and blood of humans along the way. I only ate the things thatclimbed out from under the ground…I believed that they were ghosts as disgusting as I am.”
“I always wanted to ask you…what counts as life?” Shen Wei felt the hands that Zhao Yunlanhad wrapped around him tighten. “Later, at Denglin (Deng Forest), I finally met you as you werepreparing to go up to Penglai…Who would have thought that in the end when I saw you I wasn’table to get any of the questions hovering on the edge of my lips out.”
“Why was I going to Penglai?” Zhao Yunlan asked in a hoarse voice.
“Of the three great ancient godly mountains, Buzhou already fell and Kunlun is a forbidden areafor the gods that ordinary people couldn’t reach. Only Penglai could protect the creatures on theground. However, there were too many creatures. Within the three tribes, at most only two couldgo up. The rest could only wait for Nuwa to perfect the technique of mending the skies with thefive colorful stones and leave their fate to the heavens.” As Shen Wei said this, he suddenlypaused, “I hate the phrase ‘leave your fate up to the heavens’.”
“Then wouldn’t they be beaten even more to a stupid state?” (lit: their people brain be beateninto dog brain)
Shen Wei said: “Shennong thought that because you were born as a mountain god, you wouldfavor the witches and the demons and abandon the humans. He originally planned onpersonally bringing Zhuanxu (t/n: an important mythological emperor) to come up the mountainto see you. He didn’t imagine that you’d only set up an array at the foot of Mount Penglai. At thebottom of Mount Penglai, you arranged a simple altar containing Chiyou’s head and placed itright in the middle of the mountain road. The demon tribe had always regarded Chiyou as itsancestor. They were the first to kneel down to pay their respects. Additionally, after the time ofHuangdi Xuanyuan (t/n: a legendary emperor), human tribes also respected Chiyou as the Godof War and so Emperor Zhuanxu stopped them and made them stand behind the demon clan tobow their heads in respect. Only the witch tribe did not give heed. They clamored to claim aposition on the mountain and did not bow or show their respects. They were indifferent toChiyou’s head and walked directly past it. Right as the witch clan passed it, Chiyou’s headdisappeared and became a road leading up to the mountains. The witch clan that had alreadywalked past became trapped by the camouflaging magic in the chasm at the bottom of themountain.”
This was why the demon tribe to this day eulogized Buzhou Mountain. This was the time whenthe demons officially replaced the witch tribe, claiming a foothold during the great flood andgaining equality with the human race…even though this equality didn’t last too many years.
“You took me and brought me through this flooded land swarming with disaster,” Shen Wei said,“From Kunlun to Denglin, and then from Denglin to Penglai. We walked bit by bit through thehuman world. We saved people, killed the man-eating demon clan, and were even roped intothe battles between the different tribes. Us demon tribe had always regarded each other asdevourable. We never had the concept of ‘same clan’. At the time I didn’t understand anything,only sometimes thought that you were wasteful when you only killed and didn’t eat, but youbecame more and more silent.”
“Let’s go up the mountain.” Shen Wei turned and held Zhao Yunlan’s waist. Zhao Yunlan onlyfelt the scene before him shift and the two of them had already rapidly arrived at the foot of thegodly mountain. Then Shen Wei leaped forward and, in an instant, brought Zhao Yunlan directlyto the top of Mount Penglai.
He didn’t see any flash of thunderous lightning, only a sky so heavy with gloom that it seemedclose to collapse. Rain stirred up layers of cloud and mist, the water vapor carrying some kind ofindescribable stench.
On the mountain summit, Zhao Yunlan caught sight of Nuwa. She was alone, dragging her longserpent tail within the sea of clouds, while Kunlun had with him the young Ghost King as theystood beyond the cloudy waves, watching her from afar.
The Kunlun of then and there had changed greatly since the time Zhao Yunlan had first seenhim in the Profane Land. He was leaner, his naturally deep-set features revealing a trace ofineffable weariness; yet his gaze was clear and steadfast, above his whittled thin cheekbonesall the more evident.
Nuwa suddenly turned her head, her beautiful face still worn with worry, and said: “Kunlun, whatif Shennong was wrong? What if we were all wrong?”
Kunlun tucked his hands in his sleeves, the roaring wind blowing his long sleeves and raimentup and down, to and fro, as he calmly said: “It’s all right—then this is our atonement by death,dying for a just cause. Afterwards, in these chaotic lands, when those more mighty and powerfulas Pangu emerge to meet fate once again, they’ll see our wrong path as a warning, and finishwhat we could not.”
Nuwa sighed, her brow smoothing out softly: “What you say is right. Shennong was alreadywrong once, I hope he isn’t wrong again, but… Even if he’s wrong, we can’t turn back. You’vetruly grown up a lot; it makes me feel that even if I die, I can leave this world in your hands.”
The words of the primeval sage were as weighted as gold and jade. As her voice descended,Kunlun could already feel an immense pressure slamming down on his unguarded shoulders,but he didn’t move or shake. Even the Ghost King behind him didn’t sense his strange state.
And so Kunlun breathed in deeply, stretched out a level palm to catch the fine rain falling fromthe heavens, and grasped from that delicate experience… the ever-present burden pressingdown upon his body.
“Actually, over these past days I’ve suddenly realized something—humans are so small andweak, they can’t rid themselves of lifelong greed, anger, and stupidity; and with their unclean sixsenses, they’re foolish and short-sighted, cruel and fond of strife—so why would you gain meritfrom creating this sort of useless thing? Why would Heaven choose the human race again andagain?” Kunlun narrowed his eyes; he gazed at the clouds churning in the distance, and withinthem the faintly visible five-colored stones. “Now I understand. The human race is reallysomething no different from heaven and earth, no different from us.”
The corners of Nuwa’s mouth carried the traces of a smile: “How are they no different?”
“Humans know from birth that they’ll die. Each day forth is a step closer to death, whether heroor coward; decades pass like smoke before their eyes, and scatter with a snap of thefingers—for different paths all lead to the same end, as if they were born to die.”
Kunlun smiled lightly. “But you see, they strive and struggle each day they’re alive: for food andwarmth, for power and property, for sentiment and the ability to live one more day—for anything you can think of. And after countless escapes from mortal danger, in their last struggle theyexhaust themselves to death.”
“What you said, I don’t understand.” At that moment, the young Ghost King at Kunlun’s side andShen Wei at Zhao Yunlan’s side suddenly spoke in unison. It sounded to Zhao Yunlan as if thebright and clear voice of the youth and the deep and low words of the man had mingled tobecome a strange duet; it made him feel all at once as if he were there in person himself,indistinguishable from the illusion of Kunlun.
Unexpectedly, ineffably, words rose up in Zhao Yunlan’s mind, and he couldn’t help but let themfall to coincide with the voice of Kunlun thousands of years ago: “Sealing the ghost race isindeed unfair; but the sin of genocide already came upon me when I trapped the witches and letthem all drown in the great flood. I have no qualms in my heart, and bear this sin without fear. Ifthe wheel of reincarnation and eternal life that Shennong spoke of isn’t successfullycompleted—if we fail, if we’re wrong, if we bring about greater calamity… then it’s only ourmistaken attempt and struggle. If we all die, new gods will come into this world. They’ll be likeus, and strive in the next attempt for the sake of eternal life, though we all know deep downinside that absolute permanence doesn’t exist, and—like humans—in the end we’ll die.”
Kunlun suddenly turned his head and looked at the young Ghost King behind him; then his gazeslipped away once more, and seemed to fall upon Zhao Yunlan many thousands of years later.Even though he knew Kunlun couldn’t see anything, Zhao Yunlan still held a kind of… illusionthat he was confronting himself at an abyss splitting space and time.
“If ‘death’ is chaos, then ‘life’ is a never-ending struggle.” Kunlun spoke thus, and lightlysmoothed out the corners of his mouth to reveal a hollow smile. Faint dimples appeared on hischeeks. His smile was like that of a child, his eyes like those of an elder.
“Nuwa,” he said, “you go first. I’m here, so you don’t need to worry about things once you’regone.”
At last Zhao Yunlan had heard the complete dialogue—and at last he understood how Shen Weihad picked out several words from this conversation that lamented the state of the universe andpitied the suffering of mankind, and changed them to mean something completely different.
Nuwa looked deeply at Kunlun. In a dazzling flash, an arc of stones overflowing with light andcolor soared like a rainbow above the horizon—they boomed and rumbled, crashing into thicklayers of clouds that burst open with a world-shaking roar of thunder and lightning. Halfway upthe mountain, humans and demons couldn’t help but prostrate themselves in worship. After anunknown time passed, the resounding thunder came to a stop; after several months, the stratusclouds parted and auspicious ones appeared. The sun shone once again in the sky, its raysfalling upon the wild, scorched, overgrown earth.
The body of Nuwa, silent within the sea of clouds over Mount Penglai, suddenly collapsed andfell to pieces. Her threefold hun-soul completed the Great Seal once more, her bodytransforming into Houtu; her sevenfold po-soul fell among the mountains and rivers, where softshoots of delicate grass exposed their newborn green from cracks in stone.
At some point, the doddering Shennong had climbed up to the summit. He said to Kunlun: “I’mgoing too.”
As he finished speaking, his body fell to the ground, stiff and rigid in death. Once suppressed bya human body, the divine soul cried out as he plunged from the sacred mountain to theunderground and transformed into the wheel of reincarnation. Souls that were wavering inspace, that couldn’t distinguish between day and night, were as if drawn in: and all followed himdown. The Awl of Mountains and Rivers bore into the softly trembling earth to subdue it; theSundial of Reincarnation began to revolve upon the Three-Life Stone; and, hanging high on theAncient Tree of Merit, the Merit Brush followed the endless waters of Wang Chuan up andsurfaced with every soul’s merits and demerits recorded.
“There’s one last thing missing,” Kunlun said lightly. In that moment the sky above him wassuddenly shrouded in dark clouds drawn from afar; lightning flashed and thunder rolled within,as if divine thunder from the highest of heavens was on the verge of falling. “My soulfire lit upthe Profane Land, and boiled the ghost race out of the mud. Abandoning them without care andselfishly deciding the ghost race’s destiny, it’s indeed a serious crime—but there’s something Istill haven’t finished.”
Zhao Yunlan watched him draw out his heart’s blood to be transformed into the lamp wick, andtake his body to be transformed into the lamp base. All of a sudden, he felt that he knew allthese things, not only from what he’d seen within the God Tree and the rock of the Great Seal,but rather… they had truly happened, and he’d simply not thought of them for a while, nothingmore.
And thus the wheel of reincarnation was completed in the end, life and death became a circleand henceforth there was no life or death.
The primordial essence of Kunlun bled away, and the devastating mountain wind swept alongwith it the young Ghost King who had wept himself hoarse. Together they descended beneaththe Huang Quan, to keep watch at the Great Seal.
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Chapter: 92
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